Standing in your window.
Looking up,
I see your rainbows
Grey clouds and crows.

Looking down,
Garden flowers
Weeds and dustbins.
Wooden bench you built.

I hear the drift of tunes whistled,
Guitar strummed
Barking dogs
Children running.

Imagining voices heard
With orders barked.
Questions.
Where you are?
What you doing?
How long will you be?

Yet, Intuitive, kindly, you
Made school runs,
Senior drop off
Prescription pick up
Tiffin collections.

Innovative, cleverly
Business partnerships
Rental landlord,
Humble volunteer
Avid charity mogul.

Socially charming
Coffee mate
Beer buddy
Fancy date
Adventurous companion.

Did living and the living
Grate your nerves?
Was it chaotic?
Was it tiresome?

With all the doings
All the beings
Essence was missing, lost.
We are not the sum
Of successes or failures.
Yet one too many of any
And the pot can brew over,
And all is burnt away.

You leave me no choice.
In your memory
I shall love
I shall live
Wild and full.
And my tales
I’ll still tell you,
Be them without FaceTime or text
Be them without laughter between
Our eyes and face.

You’ve left this place
Our home together
Your room,
Once my old room.
How can this be!
Yet it is.

Hoping my reminiscing,
My processing and planning,
My tears and questioning,
Disturbs you not.
Darling brother of mine
Now you are gone,
Please Rest In Peace.